Dear (Insert Name Here)

Dear Santa

I know, I have sort of waited for the last minute to write to you, but by now you probably realize that I am a procrastinator and well....a little lazy.

So I will get to the point....

for Christmas this year can you please make sure that you do not overload me with sweets, you see my bubs' family sends boxes (AND BOXES) of food to us, filled with all sorts of things that I cannot resist...cookies...cough...whoopie pies...cough. So you see, if you fill my Christmas sock with assorted chocolates I will most likely be diabetic by New Years, if you want to give treats, maybe some Cheese-Its, or some Luna Bars and Red Bull (sugar free)

Also, as you know I am really hard to buy clothes for, what with the being short but still having really long legs, also there's the whole "boobs" thing that Santas are always mystified by...so please just a gift certificate would be best, maybe something from Macy's...you know, if your looking for ideas

Books are always good, please check with my bubs, he has the list of vintage Nancy Drew's I still need, I am sure you could swipe some of those from your lazy book reading girl elves.

Most importantly this year I want happiness and health for my bubs, the mean cheese, my mom, me and everyone else I love.

oh, I also want a thicker skin and a better self esteem.

yours respectfully
Jennifer Gordon