Dear (Insert Name Here)
Dear Emma Roberts
You are adorable, I needed to just get that out in the open.
I will admit I was afraid when seeing the Nancy Drew movie that you would be horrible....and very Un "Nancy Drew"...but I was wrong, you were cute.
I have to commend you for overcoming a lot of adversity, being the niece of Julia Roberts...well yes, most people would not think of that as adversity....more a stepping stone, but you see....I am not really a fan of her...mainly I get fixated on her sometimes visible mustache....and cannot concentrate.
So, when hearing that you were her niece, well...I got sort of a pit in my stomach, and kept telling my bubs that it was "not right" that Nancy Drew just CAN'T have a mustache....but luckily you did not.
I was please though that your Dad is Eric Roberts, then I got the fool notion in my head that maybe he could pull some strings and you could be on Heroes for a few episodes next season, hell they could even do a Nancy Drew crossover, and you could be a teen detective investigating the Heroes....wait this sounds sort of pathetic, what I should really be asking is.....will you be doing a Nancy Drew II...or will they replace you with some generic horsey face girl for a direct to DVD sequel???
Now, this is where I give you a little advice, you are a young, pretty, wealthy teen star....please look to people like Claire Danes, Reece Witherspoon, and Jodi Foster for role models on how to survive through the years....I feel my heart would suffer greatly if you were to start having babies and going clubbing with Brit, and Paris....
Don't get all skanky and gutter trash, please...I beg of you!!!
in all seriousness, you are too charming for that, now....I am not going to say you are the next Meryl Streep....that might be saying too much, but you very well could be the next Julia Roberts...and well that is fine with me.