just me on a cold autumn morning,

hey everyone.

first once again I want to thank all of you who have been so wonderful with your comments, and emails of support during this week...during my semi breakdown and back again.

So, you are all wondering about Craftin Outlaws, how it went, was it fun....

Now, I am left wondering do I start with the good, or the bad...I never know, some people prefer it in a specific order, others all will nilly in a chronological order...I am going to start with the bad...

• Kate was supposed to get here on Friday night, staying with me for 2 days during the show time, but.......................instead she gets in a car accident in NYC and cannot come to the show, last I heard she was fine, but sore. Stupid NYC cab drivers!!

• While setting up for the show, I notice that Carla, you might know her as supastarr is set up right next to me, and I am a hundred shades of thrilled, I love her, but then I notice someone who is not Carla setting up next to me, I sheepishly try to tell them that they are in the wrong spot...but they don't care and set up next to me anyway....oh, and they are another collage artist...wtf?

• it's sort of slow....steady but slow...slow enough for me to panic

• at one point I was "this close" to selling my piece The Beekeeper's Wife, the women were fighting over whether or not to put it in the bedroom or living room, it was rather adorable, so then they ask me the price, and I politely tell them it's $100...the abruptly drop the piece back onto the table with a shocked looked on their face....all the while mumbling that it was beautiful, but not $100 beautiful......................................um, what? Really they said that, I tried to explain that it is two pieces each measuring 8x18 inches and that if they were in a gallery that piece would be priced at many hundreds of dollars, they did not seem to care....they just wandered away.

• AT one point when I was wandering around someone came to the table and my bubs was telling them that all my pieces were one of a kind and I had no prints, they went on to tell him that they were not one of a kind considering "all I was doing" was finding pieces out of magazines, all I can say is thank god I was not there, I think I would have burst into tears.

• Money wise.....I made less than I did last year, which is a disappointment as I have a $250 prescription to pick up in a few days...oh well.

OK.....................now the good (I am not a Debbie Downer)

• I bought (before the show even started and I thought I would do better) a beautiful new purse from a Vendor names Aqua Cherry....it's fantastic, it is hidden away right now to be given to me as a present, or else I would show a picture....but it is made from an amazing beige and dark brown fabric...it's looks like vintage French Wallpaper....it's amazing.

• My bubs was there to help me the whole day which was just the bee's knees, really!!!! We also got to see some of our favorite real life friends who came out to show their support.

• Megan from MoogansCreations was across from me, and like that was not wonderful enough, she made for me.....a custom "mean cheese" plush.

• I got to see a lot of the etsy people in "real life" and met a brand new glass jewelry person, also named Jennifer, you need to look at her shop, really beautiful.

• Did I mention my new purse....yeah I know I did, but really...it's that good.

• To make up for the mean things those few people said, I did hear a lot of more than wonderful feedback, in fact one young woman bought a collage and I swear she was almost crying, she was telling me she did not know a lot about art but she thought my work was "the prettiest she'd ever seen", and right there....that made the other not so nice stuff fade a way, a bit.

• whiskey drinks on a sunny but cool Saturday in Autumn...yup, sipping whiskey, selling art, and buying new purses....all with my bubs. In some ways, it was the perfect day.

So that was it, in a nutshell....now I know I should not even worry about the bad stuff, and in short I am not (anymore....Saturday night and Sunday...that was a different story). I very rarely do shows and this is sort of why, I am very, VERY sensitive about what I do, it takes a long time to build confidence and in a short instant it is whisked away, back down to nothing. I am left empty and tired when all is said and done.

That is how I am feeling now, you see....my world, my little world that I live in now is very safe, I make things I spend a lot of time alone in my studio, the real world being just a hum traffic outside my window. It had been a long time since I had to put myself out there like that, and I will say it did tire me out a lot more than I thought it would.

I spent most of Sunday in a sleepy haze, not doing any "real" creating but some planning for new merchandise for my shop....

I am hesitant to say what is on the way, for fear of a little copy catting going on, but I am really excited...

Anyway so besides some planning of that, I just sort of lazed about the house, I even watched the Emmy's last night because I am a sucker for awards shows....and I am totally obsessed with Heroes and waited until the end to see them win, and they didn't...

wow, this was a whole lot of babble...yikes. Oh and if you are wondering about the picture....it's my latest altered book, it's called "A Sort Of Fairy Tale"