My Love Affair with Smoking

Now that it is getting a bit cooler out, Keith begings his yearly ritual of smoking, either a pipe or a cigar, he starts about mid-September and smokes until Christmas, he does this every year, as he says it reminds him of home...

This beautiful and sad little ritual started after he moved to Ohio so many years ago...

I will say this, I love it, I love that smokey smell...oh, I know it's bad, I know it's unhealthy...but I don't care, because the smell of Keith smoking does not remind me of home, but of my youth...sitting on cool mornings, with the very same person who I loved when I was young...it makes me dreamy...dare I say, it makes me swoon.

I should not like this...after all as an ex-smoker I should be upset...I should be upset about the poor poor condition of my lungs, I should should be reminded of the sickness it can cause...but I don't think about it. I smell the smoke, and all I can think is, God...it is cool.

I know, I know...it's not...but it still seems cool, especially now that no one I know smokes around me very much, now it holds the same allure it did when I was a teenager, and I was sneaking off to the cemetary with a stolen pack of my mom's smokes and some wine coolers...we would lay in the grass, smoke stolen cigarettes, and just bask in the glory of how cool we were.

I feel the same way if I even hold a cigarette now, I just keep saying "look how cool this is".

I know, I know...it's not, right? God I hate being a grown up, I hate having bad lungs and the memory of my father's death all associated with smoking...why can't it be cool, why can't I be transformed into a Hollywood glamour girl* that would rock...until then I just have me...and my guy, and his beautiful fall tradition, and hos smokey flannel shirts that make me feel 16.

I did this ACEO last night called "She Was Nothing But Smoke and Mirrors" it is available in my etsy shop.

*speaking of glamor girl...when I was little there were these little dolls called "Glamor Gals" they were little and I loved them with everything I could spare...I went to a toy show this weekend and I looked for them, but could not find any...I did find a vintage lunchbox featuring 1960's pop culture icon "Twiggy", I found it ironic that she would be featured on a food container....(she was an anorexic super model at the time...she also guest hosted an ealy episode of the Muppet Show)