Dear Insert Name Here
Dear Jennifer Lopez
aka J. Lo, aka, the other Jenny from the Block that is NOT ME!!
What's up? So, here's the deal...everyone thinks you are preggers, I even hopped on that bandwagon ages ago...but you won't say anything, when it's totally obvious, that hello....you've got a baby up in there, wither that or you are a total chubster now.
Wait....that's it, I think you are not pregnant, in fact I think now that there rumors are flying you are doing everything in your power to get yourself knocked up.
Ok, we get it, you are happy, your married, you are all "settled" so, you started eating, a lot, it started simply with a few trips to your local Hostess Bakery outlet store...and have escalated to you consuming a bag of egg noodles and 4 cheese sauce.
Am I right?
And now that the fat has hot the fan you are scrambling for a good old fashioned baby cover up.
Yeah, I could be on to something.
In all seriousness, big fat belly or baby belly it does not matter, what you should really worry about is what you are wearing, darling Jenny...you look like Mrs Roper on Three's Company...the MooMoos are awful.
So, with that I bid you adieu, and wish you luck with the big announcement, whether that be a baby announcement or just that fact that you are embracing your "larger self" wither way you are still a hottie, just ditch the 1970's curtains you have been wearing. I also want to wish you luck and hope that kids look like you, your hubby sort of looks like an E.T.
Jenny from the Block II